Author: Anthony

Posted on

Minimize our scope of control

“Those who put so much energy into controlling everything around them, end up losing control of themselves.”

This has become a philosophy I have developed. Or to put it more positively:

“One must learn to focus on controlling ones own thoughts, actions, reactions, and learn to accept that they cannot control anything outside of them-self if they wish to find any happiness in this life.”

As I grow older I am seeing more and more how true this is, based on the behavior I have seen in myself and other people. I see the truth of it all the time, but never more so than in these two extreme yet common cases:

  1. The control freak. The OCD Warrior. These are the people that spend lots of time and energy organizing and planning to make sure everything they are involved in goes according to a plan; usually their plan. But despite all the effort and energy, the end result never quite goes perfectly to their plan. Not even good enough to equal the reward expected considering all the time and effort put into planning (and that is a generous assessment. Truthfully much of the time it blows up in their face). These people often seem down, upset, or plain miserable because things did not go to plan. They lash out, and try to gain control by force. These people are generally miserable. They may often appear happy on the outside, at social gatherings; but once the party’s over it’s back to facing the deep dark void that goes right through the center of them.
  2. The adventurer. The zen master. The people who do not spend extensive time planing, if they even plan at all. The spontaneous decision makers. The people who set out on a journey with merely a direction they had in mind, and are willing to accept any obstacles that befall them. These people trust their instincts to guide them. They leave their minds open constantly to new possibilities. They are more concerned with learning about the world as the world reveals itself to them in their travels, than they are in shaping the world to be what they want it to be. These people are cool, calm, and collect. They do not get offended easily and are always willing to share their wisdom. These people take nothing for granted and are joyous with all that life has given them.

I believe most of us know people that fit the two descriptions above, as well as many variations in between.

Minimalism, true Minimalism is about narrowing ones scope of control to be more like person 2 than person 1. By living smaller, with fewer possessions, fewer obligations, fewer commitments, one has more time and energy to focus on making them-self  a better …..self. A person focusing on becoming a better version of them-self is on a more assured path to happiness, than one who is controlling the situations and things around them. If one chooses the path of control, they will lose them-self in the process (If they ever knew them-self in the first place).

People that try so hard to control everything around them, do so only because their identity is weak. Their attempts to control everything offer them some validation when things go according to plan. Those with strong identities on the other hand prefer to spend more time on self discovery; as they already know that is the key to happiness. They have a strong enough sense of self that they feel no drive to control everything around them. They do not require the validation of being surrounded by a home, house, area, arena, or life that is custom tailored to their specifications.

Posted on

Monks and Minimalism

That’s right, I said Monk. I have recently done a small bit of research on the life of a Monk. All kinds of Monks (Buddhist, Christian, Shaolin). Through my research of all these different types of Monks, I discovered one thing they all have in common: They are all minimalists. Every single type of Monk. EXTREME Minimalists. In fact, it’s the very fact that they are Minimalists that make them Monks. And vice versa. One can even argue than monastic living is just an extreme form of minimalism.

These are a people that have a narrow focus of passion toward something they consider bigger than themselves. In order to maintain that focus, they live in an environment, in a lifestyle free of all distraction that would serve to deviate them from their focus; from the images that they see, to the food they eat. What is that, if not the very definition of Minimalism (extreme minimalism)?

We Minimalists are a bit Monkish, are we not? Our passions are not all in religion/faith, but so many of us have our passions in something bigger than ourselves: music, teaching, Reiki, cycling, children, etc. And if we spend so much time and effort on our passion, does that not kinda make it our religion, our faith? Think about it.

If ever there was a template, or guide which to follow on how to be Minimalist, the life of a monk is definitely a solid standard. For some interesting tid bits and philosophy of the life of a Monk, follow the links below. I tried to get links that did not focus on the passion itself (no religion), but rather the lifestyle designed to create focus on that passion.

The Buddhist World: Lay Buddhist’s Guide to the Monk’s Rules

12 Essential Rules to Live More Like a Zen Monk

Inside the Life of a Shaolin Monk | The Huffington Post

The Productivity Monk Lifestyle

Posted on

Winter Depression

Now I can’t speak for all people, but I believe I can speak for many when I say that winter really can bring on the doldrums for us if we don’t find some indoor outlet to keep ourselves busy. Lack of sunlight and outdoor time can have a very real effect on our mind and body. Whether it is just a lack of vitamin “D”, or cabin fever, this season has a way of making us feel miserable. You see, most of us Minimalists are outdoor people; after all, that’s where the world is, outside our front door. It’s easy to have very few material possessions if you’re seldom even home.

But when the winter comes ……. we spend a lot of time at home. More than we care to. Everybody does. At least that is the way it is up here in the northeast US. Now, for those who are actually into winter outdoor activities, all the power and love too you. Get down with the Skiing, Snow Shoeing, Snow Boarding, or whatever the it is you guys do. I commend you for that. As for me, I can’t stand the cold. I need the warm weather. But if I go more than a couple days without sunlight, I get depressed.

Over the years however, I have discovered many indoor activities (not necessarily home activities) that are my go-to for the winter season. Social, active, and/or skillful activities to “fill us up”, or add value in the cold dark winter. These include:

  • Roller skating at the roller rink.
  • Bowling
  • Pool (billiards)
  • Games with friends and family. Video, Card, and board. (I do this all year long actually).
  • Exercise classes at the gym.
  • Read a good novel.
  • Take on a small project. I once knew a lady who had a lot of down time, so she decided to make gingerbread candy houses for poor children who would otherwise not get much (if anything) for Christmas. Ya never know.
  • Winter is the perfect time to get started on whatever goals we have set for ourselves for the year, ya know, before the sunshine and good weather comes in and deviates us. I.E. If the Winter is dreary anyway, might as well get started on some of the boring steps on the path toward our goals for the year (think about it).

So much depends on where we live, as to what is available to us. I can only speak for the activities I have found. If anybody knows of any others, please comment on this post.