Author: Anthony

Mental de-cluttering means purging ones mind of thoughts and emotions that do not serve their best interests; purging out negativity, unproductive thoughts, and mental “fluff” entertainment. Here are the pieces of mental baggage that we must rid ourselves of in order to prosper:

• Hate – This is the worst kind of mental baggage there is. Has hate ever made anyone feel good? (rhetorical) Of course not. Hate makes us miserable. Acting upon hate only destroys, it never creates. Let us not confuse “hate” with “anger”. Anger can be a very positive motivation if we focus it properly. Even if the hate is never acted upon, it still hurts us internally. It causes us to lose focus.
• Judgement on others – Now this is just a waste of mental energy. First of all, how often do our judgments of others affect our lives? Not much. Second, if we are not walking in their shoes, then the information we are exposed to from which we make our judgement is limited. Unless we are exposed to all the information, we can not make a sound judgment. If you are compelled to judge someone, judge yourself. In fact, that is actually a productive use of mental energy. Periodically ask yourself: Am I the person I want to be? What do I want to accomplish? Am I valuable to my peers?
• Excessive Self Judgement – Self judgement is good only in the sense that it acts as a progress marker toward accomplishing our goals, but it goes too far when we begin to label ourselves. Whether we have judged ourselves high or low, good or bad, it only serves to inhibit us from growing. A person who judges them-self very high will feel a sense of entitlement, develop a strong sense of pride, and may become very complacent in their current standing. All of these things are destructive, ego is self sabotaging. A person who judges them-self low will be depressed and lose motivation.
• Empty Calorie Entertainment – Concerning ones self with “Who’s dating who, and whether or not this person cheated on their BF one night in Cabot” on their favorite reality TV show. Entertainment is great to have, don’t get me wrong. But I have seen too many people spend too much mental energy on happenings that have no impact on their lives whatsoever. That mental energy could have been spent toward contributing to their own growth.

If we have successfully de-cluttered our minds, then our social behavior will work itself out. What we speak about is just a reflection of that we think about. Ah, but we may have to purge who we socialize with. It only stands to follow that we should only be surrounding ourselves with people that are not bogged down by the same mental baggage I mentioned above. For if we do, then we will end up carrying that baggage with them. People like:

• Gossipers – These people are passing judgement on everybody. You too BTW. Destructive and unproductive.
• Ego Maniacs – They put them selves on a pedestal, and often talk down to us. Conversations with these people are not two way. They want to tell you all about themselves, and are not even listening when and if you sneak in your turn to speak.
• Miserables – These people are just too lazy and down on them self to be productive. Twenty minutes with one of these, and you’ll feel you have been listening to The Cure, Tori Amos,  and Nora Jones all day. You just want to hang yourself with your belt.
• War Mongers – People who treat hate and/or violence like a virtue. They have been consumed with hate so long, that its a way of life for them. They don’t even realize that they are unhappy.
• Entertainment Junkies – While these people are often very fun to hang out with, their conversation tends not to go beyond small talk and “empty calorie” information. Fun in small doses, but in no way supportive of our goals.

 

Remember this:

Small minds discuss people.

Mediocre minds discuss events and places.

Great minds discuss ideas and concepts.

At the very core of a minimalist lifestyle (and most lifestyles for that matter) is the necessity for purpose. As human beings most of us have the urge, and the drive to have something to feel passionate about, and pursue it. Once we have that something in our lives that we are passionate about, and we cultivate that passion, it gives us a very real sense of purpose.

For some of us that purpose is clear early on in life, and we spend our entire lives cultivating that passion. For others, we have many passions, many purposes that we pursue which we have at different periods in our lives. Either way, for those of us that have that need for purpose, it can be miserable to be caught in a phase in our lives when we have no purpose. Often times when we are in this situation, we are too bummed out to even pursue a new passion. I’ve seen many people, of many ages, who have been at exactly that phase of their lives. It usually follows a huge life changing event:

• A parent who’s last child just moved out on their own.
• A divorce.
• Graduation.
• Death of a loved one.

Once the majority of the grief or excitement of this phase has passed, we often feel emptiness inside that we mistake for just more grief. It’s not grief; It’s lack of focus, lack of passion, lack of purpose.

The first step in overcoming this is to recognize that this is the reason why we are so empty, so numb, so miserable. This is not so easy to realize in the wake of a major life change. It has been my experience that most people don’t realize this, at least not quickly; so I was inspired to write this essay. It is my hope that this will reach many going through this right now.

The second step is to find something we can be passionate about.

For some, after step 1, step 2 is easy. We just pursue a passion correlated with the life changing event. Graduation leads to a career in your field of study (Duh). If our husband/wife died of cancer, we may be driven to a career in the American Cancer Society, or start a foundation of our own. If our last child moved out ……… “let’s get pregnant again.”

For others, we may not have anything that we would feel passionate about doing. Maybe a graduate no longer has any interest in their field of study. Maybe the widow/widower has no urge to “fight the good fight.” Maybe the old parent is “done with kids.” Well I am here to tell those people: You better find renewed purpose, or the empty feeling inside will just grow. Not only that, but you will grow old quicker, get slower.

There was a time in my life when I was left without a fulfilling purpose. When this happened I considered many potential directions to give my life meaning. I would like to share some of these ideas. As not only are they very noble fulfilling purposes in general, but they also lend themselves to a minimalist lifestyle.

1. Military service – Serving our country is considered one of the most fulfilling purposes there is.
2. Volunteer in the Peace Corps – Building communities. Saving lives. Acquiring knowledge one might not otherwise acquire. Getting hands on experience. Excellent job and real life experience. Free room and board. This is still my plan “B” if I am ever at the crossroads again in life.
3. AmeriCorps  – Basically the same as Peace Corps, only confined to America.
4. Work/volunteer at a local United Way chapter – An excellent way to make a difference in our community.

When I was at this crossroad, I ultimately ended up choosing to become a husband, and a father soon after. Now I have very fulfilling purpose as a husband, father, and minimalist promoter/educator. I am also a cyclist, but I would not go so far as to say that is a purpose; definitely a passion though.

It is a big world, and there is a whole plethora of opportunity for purpose. One need merely look for it. And of all the opportunity, there will be at least one that will spark our interest. As long as we are alive, God still has purpose for us. It’s just up to us to find that purpose.

We all know that the minimalist pool of possessions is limited to only the things we use on a regular basis, the things that we value. Things, such that ownership of these things is necessary to use these things at the capacity we wish to. Therein lies the two factors that determine exactly that the size of our possession pool is going to be: Value and accessibility (or availability).

You see, there are all kinds of minimalists out there. Some live in apartments, some live in houses, some have multiple vehicles, some have none, some live in the city, some are country folk. But what they all have in common is that fact that they use everything that they own. That is what makes them minimalists. What makes the quantity of their possessions vary greatly from one minimalist to the next, is the fact that they have wildly different values. Also, their accessibility to the tools and resources needed to serve those values is a huge factor too.

 

Example: One minimalist has a passion for re-building classic muscle cars. Well in order to facilitate this passion this person would have to have a large space (usually a garage) where they could conduct their work. They would also have to have a plethora of tools to be able to carry out the re-building process. Oh, and a whole bunch of miscellaneous car parts. This passion, this value, demands tremendous “overhead.”

On the other hand a minimalist that has a passion for writing would not require so much overhead. Their work is more digital than anything else, and everything they need can be stored on their laptop computer.

Does this make Mr Mechanic any less of a minimalist then Mr Shakespeare? Of course not.

 

Example: One minimalist may live in the deep country. On the top of a mountain, at least 45 min from the nearest grocery store. As a result this person really “stocks up” during the once a month trip to the grocery store. They even have a giant freezer they keep in the cellar to hold giant slabs of beef, chicken, and pork. Big enough to be well stocked for the month and even longer in case access is cut off (natural disaster, snow storm, you never know in the country). This person has adapted well to their environment, and chosen to save a tremendous amount of time by not grocery shopping every week (like most of us do).

Another minimalist may live in a heavily populated city. They pass three different grocery stores on their ten minute walk from their job to their apartment. “Stocking up” is not only completely unnecessary, but an unnecessary drain on their resources (electricity and space), so they don’t even own a refrigerator. They eat their food fresh off the stand from the farmers market located just below their apartment. If they need frozen preserved food, the frozen food section in the grocery store next to the farmers market IS their refrigerator. This person has the accessibility to not require home food preservation and storage.

 

So a minimalist is not measured by the size of their possession pool, but instead by how they spend their time. Are they spending their time with intention toward a valuable end, or are the working toward a vague or unfulfilling end (just playing “Follow the leader”  their whole life).