Category: Essays

Once upon a time my wife picked up a shirt I had on a pile in a basket on the floor and asked “Is this shirt clean or dirty?” To which I replied “You tell me.” She took a good look at the shirt, gave it a couple of sniffs. “Ah, clean” she said. “Good” I took the shirt, folded it, and put it in my drawer. “I wore that shirt yesterday you know.” I said. “Ew, dirty. Get it out of there and into the hamper.” she interjected.

Argh. What makes a piece of clothing dirty? The fact that it has already been worn since its last washing? I don’t thing so. Are we not really just concerned about the cosmetics of our clothes anyway? How they look, smell, and feel. Unfortunately no.

Unfortunately so many of us are also concerned about “tiny yuckies.” So many of us have been socialized into believing that after an article of clothing is used once it is infected with tiny micro-organisms, sweat, and other elements. Now all of this is 100% true. But you know what else ….. SO WHAT. None of these “tiny yuckies” are in any way doing us any harm. The American standard of living (mostly shaped by corporate America) has influenced upon us a ridiculous and unnecessary standard for cleanliness. This is no doubt in an effort to give us a heavy toiletry supply, and heavy supply turnaround.

How do we combat this? easy. Change our definition of what we consider “clean” and what we consider “dirty”. If a piece of clothing smells good, looks clean, and feels normal: it is clean. If not, then it’s dirty. Simple. Honestly, we mostly only wear clothes for cosmetic reasons, so why should we be concerned about anything more than the cosmetics of them anyway? We also wear clothes for personal shelter reasons, but I’m pretty sure that the “tiny yuckies” will have nil effect on this function.

Furthermore, this same logic can also be applied to us, not just our clothes.

Altering our perception to this more realistic concept of what is “dirty” has the clear benefit of freeing up space, time, and money. To elaborate: We will have fewer laundry chores, less laundry soap, less shopping for laundry supplies. There is also the hidden benefit that by cleaning our clothing less, we actually extend the life or our clothes. Those dust particles in the lint trap didn’t come from nowhere; they are the ripped off remnants of our clothes.

Being overly cleanly has adverse effects on our bodies as well. Particularly our face and hair. So many of us use special soap and moisturizers on our faces to keep a clean and youthful look. But what we may not realize is that those moisturizers and soaps do more harm than good. Without even considering the adverse effects of the potential chemicals in these soaps and moisturizers, soap cleans too much. That’s right, soap cleans TOO much. It washes off the dirt, yes, but it also washes off the bodies natural oils necessary to protect the skin. And wouldn’t you know it, those natural oils do a better job at keeping the skin protected and “young” than any moisturizer can.

So it turns out the only reason we need moisturizer is because our harsh soaps are damaging and drying out our faces. So, lets not wash our faces so much. And when we do, use a gentle natural soap. We also wash our hair every time we take a shower. Doing so robs the hair of IT’S natural oils keeping the hair silky, smooth, and strong.

So we should apply the same rule to our bodies as we do our laundry: If it feels, looks, or smells dirty, clean it. If not, don’t. With this simple change in perception, we will free up a little money, a little space, and a whole lot of time.

Mental de-cluttering means purging ones mind of thoughts and emotions that do not serve their best interests; purging out negativity, unproductive thoughts, and mental “fluff” entertainment. Here are the pieces of mental baggage that we must rid ourselves of in order to prosper:

• Hate – This is the worst kind of mental baggage there is. Has hate ever made anyone feel good? (rhetorical) Of course not. Hate makes us miserable. Acting upon hate only destroys, it never creates. Let us not confuse “hate” with “anger”. Anger can be a very positive motivation if we focus it properly. Even if the hate is never acted upon, it still hurts us internally. It causes us to lose focus.
• Judgement on others – Now this is just a waste of mental energy. First of all, how often do our judgments of others affect our lives? Not much. Second, if we are not walking in their shoes, then the information we are exposed to from which we make our judgement is limited. Unless we are exposed to all the information, we can not make a sound judgment. If you are compelled to judge someone, judge yourself. In fact, that is actually a productive use of mental energy. Periodically ask yourself: Am I the person I want to be? What do I want to accomplish? Am I valuable to my peers?
• Excessive Self Judgement – Self judgement is good only in the sense that it acts as a progress marker toward accomplishing our goals, but it goes too far when we begin to label ourselves. Whether we have judged ourselves high or low, good or bad, it only serves to inhibit us from growing. A person who judges them-self very high will feel a sense of entitlement, develop a strong sense of pride, and may become very complacent in their current standing. All of these things are destructive, ego is self sabotaging. A person who judges them-self low will be depressed and lose motivation.
• Empty Calorie Entertainment – Concerning ones self with “Who’s dating who, and whether or not this person cheated on their BF one night in Cabot” on their favorite reality TV show. Entertainment is great to have, don’t get me wrong. But I have seen too many people spend too much mental energy on happenings that have no impact on their lives whatsoever. That mental energy could have been spent toward contributing to their own growth.

If we have successfully de-cluttered our minds, then our social behavior will work itself out. What we speak about is just a reflection of that we think about. Ah, but we may have to purge who we socialize with. It only stands to follow that we should only be surrounding ourselves with people that are not bogged down by the same mental baggage I mentioned above. For if we do, then we will end up carrying that baggage with them. People like:

• Gossipers – These people are passing judgement on everybody. You too BTW. Destructive and unproductive.
• Ego Maniacs – They put them selves on a pedestal, and often talk down to us. Conversations with these people are not two way. They want to tell you all about themselves, and are not even listening when and if you sneak in your turn to speak.
• Miserables – These people are just too lazy and down on them self to be productive. Twenty minutes with one of these, and you’ll feel you have been listening to The Cure, Tori Amos,  and Nora Jones all day. You just want to hang yourself with your belt.
• War Mongers – People who treat hate and/or violence like a virtue. They have been consumed with hate so long, that its a way of life for them. They don’t even realize that they are unhappy.
• Entertainment Junkies – While these people are often very fun to hang out with, their conversation tends not to go beyond small talk and “empty calorie” information. Fun in small doses, but in no way supportive of our goals.

 

Remember this:

Small minds discuss people.

Mediocre minds discuss events and places.

Great minds discuss ideas and concepts.

At the very core of a minimalist lifestyle (and most lifestyles for that matter) is the necessity for purpose. As human beings most of us have the urge, and the drive to have something to feel passionate about, and pursue it. Once we have that something in our lives that we are passionate about, and we cultivate that passion, it gives us a very real sense of purpose.

For some of us that purpose is clear early on in life, and we spend our entire lives cultivating that passion. For others, we have many passions, many purposes that we pursue which we have at different periods in our lives. Either way, for those of us that have that need for purpose, it can be miserable to be caught in a phase in our lives when we have no purpose. Often times when we are in this situation, we are too bummed out to even pursue a new passion. I’ve seen many people, of many ages, who have been at exactly that phase of their lives. It usually follows a huge life changing event:

• A parent who’s last child just moved out on their own.
• A divorce.
• Graduation.
• Death of a loved one.

Once the majority of the grief or excitement of this phase has passed, we often feel emptiness inside that we mistake for just more grief. It’s not grief; It’s lack of focus, lack of passion, lack of purpose.

The first step in overcoming this is to recognize that this is the reason why we are so empty, so numb, so miserable. This is not so easy to realize in the wake of a major life change. It has been my experience that most people don’t realize this, at least not quickly; so I was inspired to write this essay. It is my hope that this will reach many going through this right now.

The second step is to find something we can be passionate about.

For some, after step 1, step 2 is easy. We just pursue a passion correlated with the life changing event. Graduation leads to a career in your field of study (Duh). If our husband/wife died of cancer, we may be driven to a career in the American Cancer Society, or start a foundation of our own. If our last child moved out ……… “let’s get pregnant again.”

For others, we may not have anything that we would feel passionate about doing. Maybe a graduate no longer has any interest in their field of study. Maybe the widow/widower has no urge to “fight the good fight.” Maybe the old parent is “done with kids.” Well I am here to tell those people: You better find renewed purpose, or the empty feeling inside will just grow. Not only that, but you will grow old quicker, get slower.

There was a time in my life when I was left without a fulfilling purpose. When this happened I considered many potential directions to give my life meaning. I would like to share some of these ideas. As not only are they very noble fulfilling purposes in general, but they also lend themselves to a minimalist lifestyle.

1. Military service – Serving our country is considered one of the most fulfilling purposes there is.
2. Volunteer in the Peace Corps – Building communities. Saving lives. Acquiring knowledge one might not otherwise acquire. Getting hands on experience. Excellent job and real life experience. Free room and board. This is still my plan “B” if I am ever at the crossroads again in life.
3. AmeriCorps  – Basically the same as Peace Corps, only confined to America.
4. Work/volunteer at a local United Way chapter – An excellent way to make a difference in our community.

When I was at this crossroad, I ultimately ended up choosing to become a husband, and a father soon after. Now I have very fulfilling purpose as a husband, father, and minimalist promoter/educator. I am also a cyclist, but I would not go so far as to say that is a purpose; definitely a passion though.

It is a big world, and there is a whole plethora of opportunity for purpose. One need merely look for it. And of all the opportunity, there will be at least one that will spark our interest. As long as we are alive, God still has purpose for us. It’s just up to us to find that purpose.