Category: Essays

In general, people are so attentive to national and global affairs. Both politically and socially. They are so attentive to these affairs, but seldom do they even know who their town Mayor is. Seldom do they know how the local college basketball team ranks, but they sure know how well their favorite NBA team is doing. They can find out in the paper or online how well Amazon stock is doing, but are they giving any attention to how well “Joe’s Farmers Market” is doing for business just down the road from them. Do they even shop at Joe’s?

This is most unfortunate for them because as it turns out, our local political/economic/social climate has more impact on our day to day lives than the national and global climates do. With that being said, should not our attention be divided accordingly.

With regard to politics, it’s our city council that manages the upkeep of our community (trash disposal, snow removal, etc), issues building permits, and decides school funding. They make the final decision on all the funding of local amenities we use every day. It is also worth mentioning that our votes matter more in local elections than national ones (as confirmed in the “Partisanship and Representation in Local Politics: New Evidence from Mid-Size U.S. Cities” where it states “city councils are even more powerful than Congress in terms of their ability to shape budgetary policy in the face of executive branch opposition,”), and the way they shape it completely depends on the political sides of the voters.

Shop local, when possible. More of our hard earned dollar goes to our community when we do so. This in turn makes for more jobs, more businesses, more opportunity, and just more prosperity overall. When we shop corporate, 45% or less of the money we spend goes back into our community. When we shop at small local businesses however, at least 65% of our dollar stays in our community. A difference of at least 20% is huge.

Socially …… be neighborly. In today’s culture, I am seeing mine, and others neighbors passing each other on the way to/from their homes with hardly an upward glance from their mobile devices to say “Hi.” These are the people physically closest to us, having a positive relationship with them could have enormous benefits. Unfortunately to many of us don’t know that, because we are attached to our devices and socializing with people miles away (not much benefit there). Neighbors that are neighborly lookout for each others property. They greet each other with big smiles in the morning to set off each others day on a positive note. They are an extra set of hands when we need help carrying groceries into the house. In the end, they are a potential convenient resource. Don’t have a rapport with our neighbors?? Halloween is coming up. No better time to break the ice.

Once we become more community oriented, and perhaps a little less “world spectator”, we discover a world that we can play a more active role in, and therefore get more fulfillment from; a larger world (ironically). A more real world.

We wash our car, clean our pool, mow the lawn, wash the dishes, vacuum the floor, wash the windows, dust, scrub, and polish all our stuff. We do all this without question because we know these things require maintenance if we want them to last. We accept this.

But what about our relationships?

Are they being maintained as well?

You see …… contrary to popular practice, relationships need to be maintained as well; and since the people in our lives are far more important than the things in our lives, I’d say that maintaining our relationships are by far a higher priority than maintaining all the stuff.

It should also go without saying, that the deeper, the more complex the relationship, the more maintenance it requires. The word “maintenance” has a negative connotation to it for most people, as maintenance is just another word for “work.” I want to make it clear that maintenance is simply time and effort.

Common practice is such that once a relationship is created and established with a solid foundation, people think that they can just let it idle while they go about the rest of their lives. They are confident that they can just pick it back up when they have time and desire. The problem with this is, as more time passes, both parties change as people, they grow. As more time passes, the desire weans. So when both parties finally have the time to spend with each other, the connection has diminished. The connection that was had, was with two very different people. The emotional subtleties …. forgotten.

Had the relationship been maintained, the two parties would have grown together and the connection would have evolved with them.

This fact holds true for ALL the relationships in our lives. The most obvious one is our life partner, but it applies to our children, parents, siblings, friends, and even our neighbors. All of these relationships have greatly varying levels of maintenance required, but all require it nonetheless.

If too much time passes, and a connection is all but diminished, we need to ask ourselves “Is this worth saving?”, “Is it worth re-establishing this connection?” If the answer is “Yes” then the maintenance we need to put in IS ACTUAL WORK. At least in the beginning, until a new strong connection is formed. This is very necessary and rewarding work.

This can be avoided altogether by correctly prioritizing our maintenance.

In short, spend time with the people in our lives, not the things. The things in many of our lives could be taking us away from our relationships.